"Bleh" describes how I feel.
I went to the clinic for 12:30 and when put in the room waiting for the Doctor I started to cry so hard. I sat there crying and crying.
When she finally came in I was a wreck. My LH was 28 which means I'm surging now. She said I could take my Ovidrel right away (which I did) and I was told to go back in tomorrow for my first IUI. I may end up doing 2 since I have the extra vial.
Do you ever have a cycle where you think it's so good you better not fuck it up? This is the first time I've had such great follicles. The last two cycles were almost canceled because I performed so badly and had cysts.
As I cried to my Doctor "I just want this time to work so badly" but doesn't everyone? She tried to make me feel better by telling me one of her Lesbian couples just got pregnant. Yeah, that didn't make me feel all that great. I know it's possible for Lesbian couples to get pregnant. I just want to know why this one (ME) can't! I had really hoped that triggering would help. I'm not even sure it matters now since I've surging on my own.
Sigh.
I'm going to go and try to relax now... which means I'm going to sleep.
this process is so stressful..I have totally been there with the balling in the doctors office.. I am sorry you were there today. It sucks to not feel like you can trust yourself, your doc, or the process. I hope you are successful this time, but I think it's a great idea to go to a smaller more personal clinic as long as they have a good reputation. FX that this is the one :)
ReplyDeleteKelly (Irish1971)
With our doctor if you were doing 2 IUIs she would have you inseminate the afternoon of the surge and the next day so I do find your doctor's timing a little strange, if only because they do work at the same clinic! Hopefully it doesn't matter as we only did 1 IUI and it was always noon the day after the surge was detected.
ReplyDeleteKelly - Thank you for your kind words of support, it means a lot!
ReplyDeleteAngele - It is so crazy how different our experiences have been at this clinic. There is no way I'd get an IUI the same day as the surge. I learned this on cycle 3 when my afternoon call said my LH was 96 and they still scheduled my IUI for the next day. Of course by the next morning's u/s I'd ovulated so that cycle was ruined.
IF they were PROACTIVE, saw my results and called me in I'd be so pleased. Instead I always have to worry one day in advance. That's why I was freaking out yesterday. Had my LH been high today and I hadn't been sitting on their doorstep there would be no way for me to have an IUI. I'd have to wait another day and just hope my follicles were still there. It's so frustrating!