TGIF

I can’t say TGIF enough. I’m so exhausted this week. Last night we went to our LAST concert for a while. I told the baby as we were leaving that I’d give “her” some peace and quiet from now on! The show was good - Coldplay was awesome. I’m not a huge fan (not really a fan at all) but as I suspected, they put on a killer show. The whole point of this was to expose my brother to something he’s never experienced before and when he had expressed interest in Coldplay I jumped at the chance to take him. He’s still young but obviously musically gifted. I think he does have a career in music ahead of him but I’m not sure if it is what he thinks it will be. I wanted him to get excited by a sold out show at a big venue with screaming fans because that’s a far cry from what he is used to. He ended up having a good time and was really funny about it. He turned to me at the beginning of the concert and asked: “Is this how loud they’re going to be? Because I don’t think I can handle the bass.”!! Later he asked “Did you think they were going to be this good? They’re really good!” Too funny! When they played his favourite song he sang out loud along with everyone else. It was awesome to see! He may not fully appreciate it now, but I’m sure he’ll be pleased that he went to a concert of this magnitude as his first. Like D said, she wishes her first concert had been like Coldplay as a kid and not Milli Vanilli (mine was NKOTB at 11 years old). I’ve already told him that we’ll get tickets to a Musical next and hopefully one that has an orchestra pit. Like I said above, I really want to expose him to new things so he can see that there are many options for musicians.
In other happenings, my mother left yesterday. She didn’t end up staying for the long weekend. I’m a bit guilty of being happy about this because it means I will not have to entertain all weekend (all I want to do is sleep). She came to Toronto on Tuesday to go to my OB appointment. She was able to see the hospital and meet our nurse/doctor. She heard the heartbeat which was exciting for her. I’m glad she had that opportunity because I think it has made her feel more included. Overall, we only spent a few hours over a couple of visits during this trip but it was enough. She plans on returning in September but like always, I won’t hold my breath! She also confirmed that she’d like to come down and visit after the “excitement” dies down in December/January. In other words, she will NOT be here for the birth of the baby. I am OK with that decision. She doesn’t play fair so this is probably for the best.

Newest Nephew

Welcome Aidan!
9lbs 6oz, via c-section, 3 weeks early. He's going to be a big boy!
Did Mommy get her tubes tied while they were yanking you out?

Names

For fun, I’ve been reading the birth announcements in the classified ads to see trends. I find it hard to go by top 100 lists because they’re all different depending on where you are looking or between countries. One of our names flutters around the top 30 depending on various lists yet we have started to hear it everywhere we go and think it may be very popular.
So far that name hasn’t shown up but many other “popular” names have. The Aidan, Jayden, Cayden trend certainly exists in full force– specifically, Jayden. Also, Lucas is very popular (variations Luca and Luka), Ethan and Trent. For girls, there were a few names that stood out like Addison, Abigail and Ava. Clearly “A” names are hot right now but I think they have been for a while – I have both an Ava and an Abigail in the family. Overall, the girl’s names were not as prominently overused as the boy’s names were. One name I was surprised to see more than a few times was Shayla and variations like Shalyn, etc. Where the heck did that name come from? Maybe it’s a Southern Ontario trend…
Surprisingly there was only one spelling that was so awful that I feel compelled to mention it and that was “Jaxyn”. At first I thought maybe it was for a girl and they thought a “y” would feminize it like “Jordyn” but no, it was Jaxyn for a boy.
A couple of kids are also going to be mad at their parents for naming them after teen celebrities like “Jonas” and “Leighton”. I don’t even know what to say to poor little “Boston” as he grows up.
Ok, so I don’t mean to make fun of anyone’s names and there weren’t any to really question other than “Boston” and I’d say that was just baffling not laugh worthy.
I didn’t come out of the several pages of names with any new clarity. I was happy to see our girl’s name only once and as a middle name. As for our boys name, I’m not convinced by not seeing it. I’ve still heard it too many times on the street to not assume its gaining huge popularity.
Settling on a name will be much easier once we know the sex. I can’t wait! Only 2 more weeks!!

Katy Perry Concert

We had a lot of fun at the concert!! Some of the music was a bit loud so I moved between the floor and the 200 section.

Pictures!! (includes a "Katy Perry" baby bump)





A blurry baby bump.... lets see how much I can stretch/distort poor Katy across my belly in the coming months.


Had a good time with my Mom, Aunt and cousins as well this weekend. My Mom has decided to extend her "vacation" through the long weekend and will be staying at our place. I guess we got along?

Saturday

Tomorrow is my day with my mom. She’s cooked up a plan for us to get together with my Aunt and two cousins. Although I would have liked for her to come in to spend time with us alone, this will also be fun. The only thing is that I’m a bit nervous to see my cousin pregnant. You’d think I’d be over that by now but apparently this proves I’m not. It’s weird because while TTC (before my cousin announced) I was never “jealous” of those around me that were pregnant. I’d take the initial hit of finding out (sometimes curse or cry) and move past it pretty quickly. I was never one to stare down pregnant ladies or women with babies and curse at them. I enjoyed reading pregnancy blogs and frequently read the parenting forums. However, now, I’ll look at people and think how lucky they are to be so big or already have their baby. I'm having such a hard time seeing myself in their place and I’m jealous!!! It’s soooo stupid and I know it...

None left to purchase...

Out of pure boredom I looked up our donor the other day. He’s no longer listed by Xytex as “Canadian Compliant” and he isn’t listed (even under limited access) through our distributor.
It seems like we haven’t had much luck picking donors or we’ve only picked extremely popular ones. A friend of ours just became pregnant for the 2nd time after a 5 year gap and was able to buy the same donor without any problem. For us, all 4 of the donors we’ve used are now unavailable. I can’t say for sure what will happen in the future but for now it looks like we’re very lucky to have purchased the 6 vials we have in storage. I’m hoping that is enough for one sibling. If not, I guess we’ll have no choice but to switch donors again.

The baby's room

This is what we're working with (yay Downtown Condo):

Our upstairs floor plan which shows the room as 10'4x8 however this includes the closet so knock off 2 feet:


Spare room set-up for baby using Huggies virtual Nursery builder:


I need to get the measuring tape out because I do not believe the room is actually 8x8. Sadly I think it may be 8x7. Yikes!

Concerts

I think I need to stop reading the internet and pregnancy magazines. It’s starting to seem like EVERYTHING can cause harm to the baby. Thanks to Google I’m now feeling a huge amount of guilt over tickets to concerts coming up (about a week apart). I’ve read that loud music can cause hearing damage and also your elevated heart rate can cause stress. I’ll be 17.5 and 18.5 weeks pregnant at the time and after that – no more. I’m done. I’ll crawl into a scent free, noise free bubble and wait for the baby to come.
Fortunately D has already agreed that if the concert is too loud we’ll move back. That is only the concern for the Katy Perry concert since we have floor tickets close to the stage. The next concert is Coldplay the following week. We have front row of the 500 section which means we have the best of the worst seats in the house so I’m not as worried about that one!
Sigh. We go to shows and concerts – we’re big entertainment junkies. I’d like to think that my elevated heart rate will be from being blissfully happy. After all, these may be the last concerts we see for a long while and who knows, maybe our kid will come out dancing? Conception and implantation practically took place on a stage! The night of our insemination I went to see Spring Awakening (onstage seating), followed by 2 other Spring Awakening performances during the TWW. We’ve seen Jersey Boys, the Sound of Music and a New Kids on the Block concerts since conceiving. Of course, I need to mention, that I started my injections of Puregon in the first aid office at a New Kids concert as well. Yes, for the record, I like to see things many, many times!
Do I have anything to really worry about? I often wonder how we got here in one piece without all of the advice Google has to offer!
btw, I'm feeling a lot of movement today... it's awesome!!

In 2 weeks...

I will be an Aunt for the 4th time.
Surprise!
SIL hid the pregnancy for 8.5 months this time... her record is 17 days post partum (nephew #1).
We found out about nephew #2 early on. A mutual friend let it slip when she gossiped about SIL being "knocked up again". At that point nephew # 1 was about 5 months old. They are narrowly a year apart.
Then came our neice. Needless to say, I was pretty angry to find out SIL was pregnant AGAIN. That time we had 2 months notice.
Here's the BEST part! She hasn't even told her OWN mother!! Her Mom gets to find out in September when she comes for a visit! I bet she'll love that! It must be awful to be so humiliated by your "mistake" that you hide it from everyone. Pretty pathetic.
FUCK
For those of you who are newer to my blog ...SIL wanted to give us her youngest two "until they could afford them". That was late last summer and we haven't spoken to them since after a big falling out over us caring about the welfare of their children.
Anyway. I'm so unimpressed. I had a really hard time getting over their 3rd but now I'm just numb. This has been so hard to go through as we've been trying so hard to build our family. It hurts so much. At least were pregnant this time. If not... I'd probably be in a psych ward tonight. I've already cried over it. Those poor kids.



-- Post From My iPod Touch

My mother - Part (lost count)

I’m staring to think my mother may be bi-polar or something to that effect. I’m not joking. The things she says to me are so far out there that I’m honestly left wondering – WTF? Her chronic on again/off again plans to visit are back on. I’m pretty sure she has put herself into a position where she cannot back out this time. My Aunt has booked vacation from work and she is carpooling with a friend who is 72 years old and who will apparently do the city driving for her since my mom is not comfortable once the highway grows larger than 2 lanes. Her new plan also includes staying with my Aunt (outside of Toronto) and coming in to see us on the weekend.
Anyway, here’s where the weird stuff starts. While talking to her she started to go on about my “inheritance” and how I had to decide if I wanted it now or if I wanted it at all. She’s trying to convince me that the best thing for our children would be for her to be their live in nanny. She even gave an example of her friends grandchildren who were too advanced for grade 1 after attending Montessori school – apparently they were bored. Oh no…. our kids may be smart… what will we do? She (without a word of a lie) asked me to imagine how great it would be for her to take care of the kids, clean our house and have dinner waiting on the table for when we got home for work. Apparently she’d be standing in the threshold of our door to “hand off” our child and go to her apartment in the attic prior to taking night school. YEAH RIGHT! The “no inheritance” option sounded pretty good to me. She basically said (in a very defeated manor) that she could spend my inheritance on an apartment in Toronto – but then I’d have nothing
So to recap, my mother wants to be our live in Nanny, house Keeper and Cook and to do this she will give US money to live in our attic (that does not exist and will likely never exist). Does something sound really off about this? To be honest, I’ve never once expected an inheritance from her so this load of &$^# about not getting it is completely irrelevant. I love the idea of her moving back down to Southern Ontario – but not to live with us!!!!!
I just don’t understand her. We never see each other and barely have a relationship. In fact, it has only been since our BFP that she’s been calling consistently once a week. She also gets very offended when I tell her that this “plan” will not work. I’ve tried to tell her that we cannot find or afford a house with what she would consider a suitable in-law suite. We live in Downtown Toronto and although we sometimes think about leaving, I doubt we will. The chances of finding the kind of house she is imagining without winning the lottery is pretty much impossible. Perhaps we can find a larger house that was a former grow-op for a decent price?
I’m not sure what I’m going to do about her….

My New Meds

Side effects include(all are too familiar at this point):

- Headache
- Unusual Tiredness
- Nausea and vomiting

Great!

I'm starting them tonight. Wish me luck! lol

Confused & Tired

Today's appointment was an exhausting and confusing 2 hours of running errands through the cavernous hospital. I saw my OB, the nurse and then had to run around to book appointments and get my blood taken.
It ends up that it only took two OB appointments for me to be diagnosed with Hypertension and referred to the High Risk clinic. Since they knew it would be at least 4 weeks until I could see the specialist they put me on medication immediately. I was told that if my BP went over 150 I had to come into the hospital. Today I was 150/96. Yikes.
With all of the hoopla involved in the "you have hypertension and need meds ASAP" I forgot to question why they were sending me for the downs screening. Before I knew it I was out the door with a pile of paperwork and on my way. I figured it would be easier to just do it and get it over with and we'd already discussed what we do with the results - ignore them. I know that is easier to say than do but a) my cousin had false results so we've already been down that road and b) Downs is something that I would be able to accept. I would NEVER terminate over it.
So with everything booked I have appointments a plenty in the coming weeks. My Anatomy scan will be August 11th (our 2nd wedding anniversary) - how cool is that for celebrating? I have appointments booked with the specialist at the High Risk clinic as well as another appointment with my OB for follow up on the new meds. This is getting complicated!

Triple Test for Down's Syndrome

I'm going to the Doctor today for my Triple Test for Down's Syndrome. Now that I've read up on the test I'm not sure why I'm doing it. What I'm hoping is to find out that my Blood and ultrasound results from my First Trimester screening were accurate and have been sent to my OB. If not I'm going to have words with my Family Doctor because it is unacceptable for them to have screwed this up.
I'm soooo cranky. Our roof leaked on the weekend after a hard rainstorm. I figured this would happen eventually since it seems to be a problem with our condo format. I know A LOT of people who have already had this damage and have already had their roof fixed. I'm sitting here waiting for the roofer to arrive. Hurry up, buddy.
I'm also really tired. I can't sleep at all anymore which is a drastic change from even a couple of weeks ago when all I wanted to do was sleep! I lay awake, tossing and turning. I pee every hour... I'm friggin' exhausted. I want a nap right now. Like I said.... hurry up roofer dude and so help me if those First Tri test results are not at the OB's office this afternoon. Grrrrrr....!!

Not suprised...

Well, it looks like my mother will not be visiting. I rarely ever take her plans seriously (she does this all the time) however I’d spoken to my Aunt who confirmed my mother was flying down to Toronto with my Uncle. I assumed tickets had been purchased and they were non-refundable. Afraid not…as of last night she’s cancelled those plans. She wants to drive but thinks she’ll come in September because there is a trade show she wants to attend. Ugh. I’m so annoyed/disappointed/angry. My mother has no concept of visiting family.
She also said she really wanted to be in Toronto for the baby being born. That turned sour quickly when I said that we are going to have a crowded waiting room with D’s mom, my dad, my step-mom and likely my brother. I had to say it because I wanted her to understand the situation knowing what her reaction would be. She promptly said she didn’t want to be in a room with my dad/brother/step-mom and quite frankly I’m taking their side, not hers, on this one. My parents (dad/step-mom) and D’s mom are my only family. I’m not going to tell any of them they can’t come because my absentee mother feels uncomfortable around them. She’s going to have to face the facts here: she’s 1 of 3 grandmothers.
Aside from the sting of finding out she’s not visiting she also took a hit at our Doula (calling me pretentious for hiring her) and saying that I probably put a bunch of expensive stuff on my registry and that she’s not going to look at it.
W-H-A-T-E-V-E-R Mom.

Random Updates..

My Mother is visiting Next Weekend– I haven’t seen her in over a year and this visit is going to set the tone for what we’ll expect from her as a Grandmother in the years to come. Basically if we get along she’ll likely come down to see the kid. I suspect if we fight, we’ll be getting packages in the mail. Honestly, I don’t really care where this goes. I want to have a nice visit but after that…. whatever. The last time I visited her was for a night in 2006 on our way home from Minnesota. When we arrived she had all of my childhood toys and belongings piled in her living room. She told me I had to take them with me when I left the next morning. What a bitch.

The Baby’s Room – We can’t see the floor. It is piled with boxes and our old couch. The door is closed and I’m ignoring it. We’re going to have to do something about that!

The Baby Registry – We went to Babies R Us and started our registry. Honestly, most of the items we could do without. We put some fun stuff on it and also practical stuff but not the crib, stroller or infant car seat. We weren’t looking for a handout but my manager offered to give us their crib. I was going to decline the offer but it’s a nice crib from a high end store. At the very least I’m going to check it out. As for the stroller, we’re really stuck on this one. We want something that folds down to a compact size since our entryway is not large. Although, now that we have the car I suppose we could store it in the trunk. Anyway, we’re leaning towards buying the Bugaboo Bee which means we’d add the corresponding Graco car seat to the registry.

Maternity/Baby Shopping – I’m now officially in maternity wear. We hit a great sale and bought a bunch of stuff. The bill came out to $167 spent with $192 in savings. I’ll need to go out again this weekend because I need to get some work pants and maybe a few more tops. It’s both thrilling and scary doing this kind of shopping. I turned to D in the change room and asked “if it didn’t work out, what would we do with all of these clothes”. It’s hard to shake that doom and gloom mentality or believe this is real!!! We’ve also bought a few items for the baby (we said we weren’t going to). We bought a couple summer overalls and 2 sets of swim wear. We’ve found that stores are really BOY or GIRL and not much in between. I’m glad we’re finding out the sex because the neutral stuff is not my cup of tea. Right now we’re buying outfits that are unisex from the boys section!

Finally….….. I don’t want to curse myself by saying this but my nausea seems to have finally gone away. I’ve had a few moments here or there but for the most part I’ve been feeling good for about a week (heartburn excluded). I’m also back on food – which is really nice! I read my 15 week summary and it said by now I’ve gained 5-10 pounds. Nope! I’ve lost weight. However with all of the food and liquid I’m now able to consume I’m sure I’ll catch up. I’m also finding that my bladder is really getting a workout. I think I’m losing sleep over the amount of times I’m peeing each night!! Yawn. zzz

Doula Hired...!

Doula Speed Dating was a success last week and we found (and hired) our Doula! It was an interesting event. It took place at a chiropractor’s office and we were situated in a treatment room (sitting on the adjustment table) and each Doula would come to us. I am so glad we had this opportunity. Finding someone otherwise would have been very difficult. I can’t imagine calling and booking appointments for interviews over and over again. We ended up doing 9 interviews in one night and in some cases all it took was seeing them to know they were not right for us. I wouldn’t want to be stuck with them for an hour consultation after that! We saw experience ranging from “I’ll be certified in September” to practicing for 20 years. It was funny when we’d ask how many births they’d attended and they’d proudly say “2”. Another one was clearly building her resume for Med school. The Doula we selected was more mature and experienced than most of the women we saw. I loved her the moment she came into the room.
After the event we went home and reviewed all of the material. I was hesitant to e-mail for a follow-up appointment right away so we waited until the next day. I was able to do some web searches to find out some more info. She seemed pretty cool so we booked a meeting for later in the week to have the inital consultation. We were on vacation and I had wanted to go to the east end at some point so we went to her house (in The Beaches) for the meeting. When we arrived we were surprised to see a rainbow flag on her front porch. I swear we did not pick her because we though she was queer! We don’t know for sure if she is but not everyone has a rainbow flag hanging around. At the very least she’s queer positive which is always a bonus! So yeah, we have a queer family doctor, OB and potentially now Doula. We live in a bubble. It’s times like this that I think leaving Toronto would be a mistake.
I just sent the deposit and agreement in the mail so we’re officially booked with her. Our prenatal visits will not be until November or December so until then we’ll have contact by e-mail or phone as needed. I’m glad we got this out of the way early. Especially with a due date of December 30th!
Also, I’m not sure how this came up in our conversation but I had mentioned that I had originally been booked with an OB at Mount Sinai but cancelled the referral when I read reviews of her on RateMDs. She asked if I knew the Doctor's name and when I told her she asked if she could “have an unprofessional moment” and said that we’d dodged a bullet. Apparently this OB is a total witch. Our Doula said her “heart drops every time she hears someone has been placed with her”. OMG. I’m so glad I went with my instincts to switch without giving her a chance!!!!!!! I’m telling you – RateMDs is awesome!

July 4th!

D and I went to Niagara Falls for July 4th to see the fireworks and to have a night away. Although I'm not a huge fan of Niagara Falls we had a really good time!

Fireworks from our hotel:


I've been a really bad blogger lately and I do have updates. I'm hoping that I'll get a chance in the next day to post.