To do list?

We still have a lot to do to get the room together and I have big plans! We still need to buy/mount shelves, return the carpet swatches, buy the carpet, schedule the delivery of the crib, find/buy curtains, put up wall art, figure out the changing table, baby proof, and more that I probably haven't thought of!

Here's a picture of the newly closeted dresser (our biggest accomplishment to date):

and that's all I'm sharing for now...... I can't wait to finally reveal the room once it is done!

Progress

We made a lot of progress on Sadie’s room this weekend. I’m very proud of what we have accomplished. The old couch was taken to our large pick-up zone (it took D nine trips) and we found a solution for our dresser. The room is now filled with black garbage bags that are full of recycling, garbage and donation items. It was bumpy at the beginning because we both had a hard time making decisions about what we wanted to keep. By the end I was determined to get rid of everything. The reality is that the storage situation in our condo sucks but at the same time, once we were going through stuff, it hit me that we really didn’t need any of it. As for the dresser, that was the one thing that we were both sad to give up. We had bought it when we lived in our apartment and when we moved to the condo we realized it was too big for the master bedroom so we put it in the spare room. What we ended up doing was taking the doors off of Sadie’s closet (sliding doors) and we put the dresser inside it. It fit within an eighth of an inch so we were very lucky. Now we have a huge amount of space for clothing – both ours and hers. Unfortunately we have lost the ability to hang items in the closet but in reality most baby clothes belong in drawers and not on hangers. Since I’m the handy woman around the condo, once Sadie is here, I plan on raising the shelf enough that we have storage space and room for hangers. Until then, this will have to do and if there are any dress clothes that need hung up they can go in our closet.
This brings me to a small rant about the condo. I can’t believe how many people have asked if we’re going to move!! It’s like they can’t imagine us raising a child downtown or in such a small space and I’m so sick of justifying our choice to stay. However, at the same time, when we went to our cousin’s shower we were a bit bummed when we saw the size of her SIL’s house. We felt like “we could never have that” but when we got home we found a house for sale on her street that was $50,000 less than the current list price for units in our condo. So yeah, we CAN afford that however we are not prepared to trade the convenience of where we live. We are not prepared to spend up to 3 hours (on a good day) commuting to work and home. In a very lazy way, I also have no desire to shovel snow or maintain yard work. I love that when my roof leaks I can fix it by sending an e-mail with no contractors or quotes or additional money out of my pocket. Yes, there are perks to those pesky condo fees.
So yes, we’re staying. I think about people living in Manhattan and pretend I’m one of them. Our place is small but big enough for what we really need. No, we can’t store all of my childhood toys or every playbill x20 to every show we’ve ever seen. One day we’ll move but not now and when we do, it may be to a 3 bedroom condo. I have to admit, I love the lifestyle!

Research FAIL

Rolling with the last post.... I went back into research mode yesterday. You know, just for fun, and because I'm INSANE.

How did I miss THIS?

I hope that was the FIRST and LAST time I ever hear that song!!!!!!!!!
For the record I was trying to figure out what song my dad sang when he found out our name. It certainly wasn't this one!!!!! It was a cute little song. If anyone ever refers to our daughter as "Sexy Sadie" I'm going to need to be restrained. Hopefully we have 16++++ years before I need to worry about that!! LOL
I imagine this is how my parents felt when people used to call me Jessica Rabbit at 10 years old!!

The next "Emma"?

A while back I spent a good amount of time researching the popularity of the name "Sadie". I looked in our local classifieds as well as online resources like the US Social Security listing of baby names. Sadie did not make the top 100 list and I only found it once in our local paper as a middle name.
On BabyCenter, however, one user (who wasn't amoung the many who said it sounded like a dogs name) wrote that they thought Sadie was going to be the next "Emma" and quite frankly I'm starting to wonder if that is true.
We're not changing our mind. I could NEVER do that but I didn't want a popular name. D has assured me that IF Sadie does become popular we are likely going to be ahead of the trend. I guess as long as Sadie is somewhat unique in her age group that is OK.
Why am I writing about this today? Well... while sitting with my friend at Subway for lunch I overheard a conversation going on behind us. "They had a baby girl..... Sadie Grace....". I am apparently very protective of that name because I was so upset when I heard it! "Noooooo that's OUR name!!!".
Yes, I know, I cannot stop anyone else from using it. Yet, if it is so unpopular on the baby name lists, why is this the second time I've heard it recently?
Oh well! At least we tried. Unlike my BIL & his dumb wife who haven't yet ventured past the top 1o most popular (actually they hover around #1 for all of their kids).

Off the Hook...

The Jury selection was completed today and I did not make it in front of the Judge. It's over. I'm exhausted. As for the trial?

Google: Lesbian Love Triangle Axe Murder (this is the second trial)

I kid you not!!! Doesn't it sound like an episode of Law & Order and not real life? I kept expecting Mariska Hargitay to walk in!

Overall I think I got off easy. When D went in for Jury Duty she was stuck there for 5 days. Since my panel was called specifically for one trial we were allowed to go once the jurors had been selected... only 2 days of my time!

THANK GOODNESS. Today we were allowed to eat/drink/talk so it was much better but it was sooooo boring!

100 days to go!!!!

Tomorrow I will be at double digits!!! Very exciting!!

What isn't as exciting is JURY DUTY. It sucked.

I thought I had an idea of what to expect based on D's experience in the spring but it didn't play out the same way today. Rather than starting the day in the jury lounge we were taken directly to the court room. Between 9:00 am and 1:00 pm we were not allowed to talk, eat, drink, chew gum, or entertain ourselves in any way. It was brutal! The judge was not hearing excuses until you were before her so I have not had an opportunity to be dismissed. Instead, we were split into groups of 20 and asked to return at a specific time. That is pretty much all that happened today since our Jury panel consisted of 400 potential jurors and my name was not called until 3:00 pm!!! My time to return for the selection process is Wednesday morning.

I'm hoping that I will not make it in front of the judge but I'm not sure if that will be the case. The process was slow and the defense seemed to be extremely critical of the jurors as they were called forward to join their panels. My guess is that it will take a long time to agree on the 12 jurors.

Overall the experience was boring and I was starving but it did have some interesting points too. The accused was in the courtroom the entire time and I ended up sitting behind her family. I was able to hear discussion between the family and her lawyer as he explained what was happening and how the court day worked. I felt so awful for them. It must be so difficult to be there for their daughter's first degree murder trial.

So I'm back again on Wednesday and hopefully that is it! I certainly hope this is considered my duty and I'm off the hook for 3 years (just in time, hopefully for my next pregnancy).

Accomplished

I feel like we accomplished a lot today! Well, more than normal at least. Today was mostly about Stanley (our car). He is now freshly oiled and washed (a first for both). Afterwards we FINALLY got around to going to Pottery Barn Kids to pick up swatches of the rug we want to buy for Sadie's room. $72 for two swatches (refundable when returned)!!! But it was worth it. I was leaning towards buying the pink version until we saw it at home. We're buying the 5x7 rug in green which will fit most of the 8x7 room and cover up the yucky dark pink carpet that is already in there.
We then did an inventory of the clothing we have purchased. We really need to stop NOW before things get out of hand.... we have 18 onesies!! Here's a picture I took before we started to hang stuff up in the closet: (that's not all of it)

Also, here is the cake I had mentioned in my previous post. I thought it was really cool although also a bit creepy. I'm pretty sure that no one wanted to eat a little hand or part of the face. Neat idea though! It was made by my cousins friend:
Jury duty on Monday! I have doctors note saying I am not able to sit jury duty so HOPEFULLY they accept it. Back in August when I received the notice I had imagined being much larger by now. I'm not sure I'm going to be able to waddle in with my hand on my back without looking like I'm faking!!

Baby Shower, etc

First, I went to my follow-up with the specialist I’m seeing regarding my chronic hypertension. My blood pressure is completely under control for now so things are looking good. I also found out that since my last appointment with him, 4 weeks ago, I have not gained a pound! I made a point to ask if this was normal and he said that it was fine but they are going to run an additional Thyroid test along with my glucose. That is definitely one thing about pregnancy that I would never have predicted! Going in I was a size 14/16 so I was SURE that my weight would be a constant focus/issue in my care. I worried that I would gain too much and I’d be constantly scolded. Apparently that is not the case for the first time in my LIFE! Some of the pregnancy pants I’ve purchased are actually falling off. My belly is getting bigger but the rest of me is getting smaller!

On to the baby shower!!
We had a really good time. My cousin married into a very large Italian family. It’s somewhat of a culture shock to spend time with them because their family is so close and so large. I did feel like the black sheep being the pregnant lesbian and all but no one asked or said anything. I was also one of 7 pregnant ladies there and other than the above mentioned I was definitely different from them! They were all done up with manicures, pedicures and highlights in their hair (I won’t do either while pregnant) and they all ate the Cheese Cannelloni that I refused to. Isn’t Ricotta on the list of things not to eat? Call me paranoid, or whatever, but I’m not taking chances with food that may not be heated to the proper temperature and is listed as something avoid! I knew this already about my cousin since she ate Caesar salad the last time I was with her. She’s so relaxed and I’m very cautious.
As for the shower itself, it was pretty much eat and then open presents. She had the most amazing fondant cake (I’ll post a picture when I get home)! I’ve learned a few things about registering from her. For example: DO NOT put wash clothes and towels on your registry!! OMG, she received so many and they are so cheap you can easily pick some up on your own. She also received everything in yellow and enough ducks to make me want to take up duck hunting. There seriously CAN be too much yellow and too many ducks. I’ve seen it! IF we were to keep the sex a secret in the future I’d probably say I only want organic clothing/blankets so that we can avoid this. At least that way you’d get some nice neutral oatmeal colours.
Next up will be our shower. We’ve decided to have two. Originally it was going to be one for friends and one for family but it is turning out that some family will come to our friends shower instead. Both will take place in November with the second one being at my 35 week mark. Hopefully I’m not too big or cranky by then but the dates ended up that way and there isn’t much we can do about it!

The "Sadie Snarl"

We made the decision to openly share the name “Sadie” with our family when we knew that there was little chance it would change. This was a name we’d been talking about for years and once we started calling our babe “Sadie” BEFORE we even knew she was a girl we knew for sure that there was no turning back.
I know most people wait for at least the name to be a surprise (if they’ve found out the sex). I’ve also heard and read so many times that people do not share their name because they do not want the feedback associated with it. I was quite the opposite in that opinion. I was sick of hearing suggestions when we already knew our name!
It turns out that we have had a 98% rate of approval for “Sadie”. It’s interesting to hear how people interpret the personality that goes with the name. My mom said that it is the name of a “very sweet girly girl” where my step-mom said that it is a cute “tomboy name”. My dad sang a song with the name Sadie in it and seemed fairly pleased with the choice.
The 2% disapproval is the funniest thing EVER. Apparently if you were born before 1940 the name “Sadie” causes the “Sadie Snarl”. We first saw this with my Grandmother. Her response was: “Sadie? SADIE? Why would you use the name Sadie? I just don’t know.” I honestly didn’t know what to say to that but it didn’t bother me since everyone else loved the name.
Next up was at my cousin’s baby shower on the weekend when I was speaking to her and grandmother and told her our name. Her reaction was pretty much identical. She had the scrunched up snarling face that made it look like we’d just said we were naming our child “Stinky”. In fact, her response was pretty much verbatim to what my Grandmother had said.
I’m not upset by this. I really wish I knew more elderly women because we’re finding this HILARIOUS!!
Anyway... I need to write about my cousin's shower and catch up on my commenting. I'll have to do that later on tonight.

Day Care

D and I are starting to apply to waiting lists for a spot in January 2011 and I'm starting to panic. Did we wait too long?
I had originally said we'd do it at 12 weeks.
I'm now almost 25 weeks.
Oh shit.
We have our eye on a downtown Day Care that is a long shot. The problem with most of the centres in our area (that we like) are the "priority lists". For example, first dibs go to Alumni, Government/Public Service Employees, Employees working at X company, in X office tower. I guess that's what happens when you live where most people work and go to school.
We're being added to the (already existing) waitlist of the Day Care of our choice but priority is given to Public Service workers so we doubt we'll get a spot. We're going to have to apply to a few more and hope we get in.
Our end goal is to land a spot at a Montessori School by my work but that would start at 18 months/July 2011. We have a 6 month gap to fill if we get into that school otherwise most other Montessori's start at 2.5 years. So far I've seen so many Day Care Centres that start at 18 months. We have a 12 month mat leave and then we have to scramble to find care for the first 6 months back at work? And these were NOT Montessori - just regular Day Care that start at Toddler. I don't get it!
FX for finding a good spot. If all else fails we're going to have to cough up the $$ to send Sadie to one of the Centres in our office towers. Hopefully D's is nicer than mine because the one in my tower is very much the LAST RESORT - playground is near a popular smoking door. Um. Gross!!

Right now I'm calling Day Care Centres that are located in fancy Condo buildings and booking tours. That should be interesting!

Stamina

Wow. I really can't believe how tired I get -physically- after such a short period of time. I'm only just coming to terms with the fact that the things I want to do are not going to be as possible at this point. Like, you know, stalking celebrities?

I haven't had the chance to check out anything at TIFF (Toronto International Film Festival). D has been going out with one of our friends while I've been staying home. She went to the red carpet for the premier of Jennifer's Body and is down at Much Music right now for a Drew Barrymore interview.

I'm not bitter at all (honest) although I do fear that this is what old age is going to feel like and I'm not going to like it!!! One thing that IS driving me crazy is when people think pregnant women are "Milking it" or "Lazy". The reason I'm not going out and running my ass off is because I know my body can't handle it. I also know that I'll pay for it if I do.

I warned D that next year we'll have Sadie and TIFF will likely be completely off limits. She has assured me that this is her last hoorah.... and I believe her...!! On the flip side we may be able to use Sadie's stroller to push people out of the way for a better view. We'll just have to wait and see!!

Impatient

I can't believe I'm writing that word already. I'm just shy of 24 weeks!! I think it may have been my trip to L&D that has gotten me so antsy (btw, thank-you for your kinds words - everything really is ok).

In any case, I am resorting to writing a list of things I'm looking forward to other than giving birth.... and trust me, I'm not complaining about being pregnant. Ilove it! It's just that while we were TTC it seemed like calendar pages were flying past and now every day seems so slow.

Cue distractions... and since I'm a big entertainment junky I'll be adding the movies I'm looking forward to seeing first... and any other important things in there:

September: TV returns! Can't wait for the 2nd episode of Glee on Wednesday!

September 11 to 13: Toronto International Film Festival opening weekend.

September 13: My cousin's baby shower. Looking forward to it and also dreading it because it seems to be turning into a huge affair.

September 18: Jennifer's Body opens in theatres!

September 21: Report for Jury Duty! (Not really looking forward to this but at least it's not a Monday at work)

September 25: Fame opens in theatres!

October 2: Whip It! opens in theatres!

October 3: Friend's house warming party - get to check out his Flip!

October 6: 3D scan @ 28 weeks

October 10-12: Thanksgiving Long weekend

October 16-18: Prenatal weekend intensive

October 17: Get together/party with friends from High School

October 30: Youth In Revolt opens in theatres!

October 31: Halloween

November: Meet with Doula for the first of 2 prenatal appointments

November 8: Baby Shower #1 (Family) TBD

November 15: Put up the Christmas tree while watching the Santa Claus Parade!

November 20: New Moon (yes, I want to see it) opens in theatres!

November 22: Baby Shower #2 (Friends) TBD

December: Meet with Doula for second prenatal appontment

December 11: The princess and the Frog opens in theatres!

December 18: Last day of work!

I don't want to think of anything later than December 18th at this point because I know there is going to be D-R-A-M-A around Christmas. My parents delusionally expect that I'll still be coming in for Christmas Eve/Day, 5 days before my due date, an hour+ away from our hospital. Let's just leave it at that for now... I'm ignoring the issue that is slowly brewing.

Also, I should be adding in that we'll probably be working on Sadie's room and the condo, non-stop! We have cleared out so much already and have taken our first round of donations to Goodwill. Our friend has also agreed to let us use her storage locker (we do not have one) and is also taking our old dresser.

I guess I should be happy time is going by slowly so we can get stuff done but still.....!!

Visit to L&D

I've just spent the afternoon at Labor and Delivery and it wasn't for a tour. (Early end of story - I'm FINE) I went in after my nurse asked me to go to get tested to ensure I wasn't leaking amniotic fluid. OMG.
I'm not yet sure where to draw the line on asking questions vs. ignoring my body and if I ever should. For the record, I've only called twice. Once was for a numb spot on my belly (apparently normal) and the second was today when I told the nurse I thought I had a bladder infection. This is one of those times when I wish I could have a midwife. I'm sure it would be much easier communicating with them!! Instead, I get sent to L&D to be poked.
Honestly, I wasn't worried going in because I was certain I was peeing my pants - gotta love the reality of pregnancy. So I took my time and went to Chipotle Mexican Grill for a burrito first. I ate it in the center of Dundas Square while listening to live Cuban Music at the "Viva Cuba" festival and watching fighter jets zooming overhead (practicing for the air show). I was quite content until I saw the television crew (lunch time news) filming and thought that perhaps, since I'd left work, I should pack up and head over to the hospital.
This was my first time seeing the L&D floor and it was very nice and well secured. I had a giddy sense of excitement thinking about being there for delivery. Can December come quickly?
While checking in I had a good laugh as a new dad came out and said that his wife thought "the baby had pooped" and "do we need to change the diaper". Um... yes. The kid is YOURS now! The doctor looked at him and said she was only there up until the baby came out! They did say that someone would be along to help them but I still thought it was funny.
I was ushered to the waiting room for a brief time before I went into triage. They checked the heart rate of the baby by hooking me up to a machine. It was kind of hard to track because she's still so small. She was rolling around in there too so the sound coming out was like a needle being scratched across a record! I had an internal exam (the first since being pregnant) and it hurt so badly. After my 1.5 years of TTC I thought I was a speculum pro but NOT ANYMORE. OUCH. It was so bad I started to cry. A lot. It was pretty pathetic.
After the poking was done the doctor (who was a resident) did a quick scan to make sure the baby was moving fine. Overall she said I'm NOT leaking amniotic fluid and that it is most likely urine as I had suspected. The pain that I thought was a bladder infection may actually be my organs moving around. She asked that I monitor it since it may be an infection but to wait until next week to see how I feel.
So that was my Friday before a long weekend! Exciting!!
I guess you can never be too cautious but that is a scary thing to say to someone like ME. I'll be able to rest easy this weekend knowing we're both ok so that is a very good thing. I'm also happy to have received the attention they gave me. My concern, even though I wasn't really concerned, was taken VERY seriously. They did everything to make sure the baby and I were ok. They even gave me the number to Triage and told me what to watch out for. I was assured that it is OK to come in to get checked out. What a relief. I thought they'd look at me like the pain in the ass that I am but instead they were so welcoming!!

What a JOKE!!

I seem to be on a roll here with blogging. I have too much to say!

I got a letter in the mail from my previous RE - the one that I HATED. It stated that as of October she'd be moving her practice from Downtown Toronto to some far flung suburb. Good for her. The BEST part was the statement "I'd love to continue treating your infertility". Right. If we decided not to move with her it would cost "$50 for a referral to a new clinic". WTH? $50 when it's HER that's leaving?

My only regret througout TTC was staying with her for too long. I'm glad to see her go for the sake of those still stuck with her. Although.... it looks like she may have screwed over her patients one last time before going!!

It's a Girl!!

We've confirmed that Sadie does NOT have a penis. This time we were given a 100%!

Our appointment was better than I had expected it to be. For $65 we had a 15 minute session where we saw a good amount of our little girl - not just her girly bits. We were even shown her face in 3D and although she isn't chubby yet she *is* adorable! We also saw her feet in very good detail. It was amazing.
I left feeling satisfied to the point where I wondered if we'd actually go ahead with our 3D/4D appointment next month. D agreed. That one is $99 for 20 minutes and it includes a CD of the images. It's a long way off so we'll decide as the appointment comes closer.

We've been working hard on the room this week and I'm hoping that we can start making some progress with assembling it. For example, I didn't want to buy the rug for the room until we knew for sure and now we're able to. I'm also very eager to put up the decorations we've purchased.

I wish that all of my worries could be taken away as easily as this one. That would be perfect.

Take away my worries...

Although I would say that my pregnancy (so far) has been better than I ever would have expected, the one thing that has been bad has been my anxiety and paranoia. I know that a lot of this is hormonal but I also blame our TTC journey. I had an OB appointment yesterday and I discussed this with my doctor. I told him that I feel like “this is our only chance” and those feelings have only multiplied since finding out we’re having a girl. He said I’m completely normal and that many women go through this.
My problem is that I skip like a broken record when I get onto something that is bugging me. One of those things was our ultrasound tech at our 20 week scan and how she said she was only 70% positive we’re having a girl. At the time we were positive we saw “girl bits” and were satisfied. That was until someone posted on BBC that their “girl” was actually a “boy”. I knew this was a possibility because I know someone IRL that had a surprise boy. Queue the broken record… I got it into my head that Sadie may not be a Sadie!!
Honestly, in the grand scheme of things, this is the pettiest worry I’ve had. I will not offer up any of the panic-inducing medical scenarios I come up with just in case someone is reading that is like me and will go off worrying too. The fact is, those worries are not worthy of the time it would take to explain them. I know I’m crazy.
Anyway, I want a second opinion regarding the sex and I don’t want to wait until my 3D ultrasound in October. My reason for this is that I do not want to ruin our 3D ultrasound by being upset by a surprise if there was one. I want to enjoy it as a bonding experience between us and the baby so I’ve booked a gender determination ultrasound for tonight. It’s going to be $65 to clear my mind of a worry that I do need not to carry with me for the next month. Of course the first person I told this to turned to me and said that “ultrasounds aren’t safe”. Sigh. LIKE I NEEDED THAT!
Some may think I’m stupid for doing this but I never could have imagined how intense my feelings are for our baby. I don’t care if she is actually a he but it DOES mean something when you are falling in love and calling them by their name. I love Sadie so much and I’m not up for surprises at this point.
FX.